


Long Away

by boo_boo_thefool



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Gen, I Made Myself Cry, Parent Tony Stark, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Pre-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Tony Stark Has A Heart, no spoilers here unless you think morgan is a spoiler but the movie is Out for real now so, that ones for Peter but he ends up fine in the end so
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-11
Updated: 2019-08-11
Packaged: 2020-08-19 10:27:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20208229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boo_boo_thefool/pseuds/boo_boo_thefool
Summary: In which Morgan overcomes a fear of spiders and Tony does some reflecting on the son he didnt know he had.





	Long Away

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place in the five year gap, probably a couple months before the time heist gets brought up to Tony for the first time.
> 
> Title from the Queen song 'Long Away', which I think is quite fitting for this story, so you should give it a listen. It's also from the album that Peter mentions at one point in this, so it kinda fits.

Tony finds that he likes doing the dishes after a lifetime of never giving it a real go. When he was a kid it was never something that he had to worry about and his M.I.T. years consisted mostly of single-use plastic and takeout. The first time he ever really did it, by hand, was at his first Thanksgiving with Rhodey’s family. Mrs. Rhodes had insisted that he help out with the dishes and he ended up staring at the sink for a good minute, unsure where to start, before the woman laughed at him. In a good, motherly way. If he’s remembering correctly, she had even muttered something about how adopting rich boys were about as good as buying a broom without a handle. Whatever that means. 

That was a long time ago, though. Nearly thirty-five years, to be precise, and he now enjoyed the mind-numbing activity of cleaning the plates and glasses his family had used for dinner. They had a dishwasher, sure, but that didn't mean he always had to use it. Doing the dishes provided a good opportunity to gaze out at the lake his family had settled by, the moonlight reflecting off of it effortlessly beautiful in its simplicity. 

“DADDY! COME QUICK!” 

Tony stands up a bit straighter at his daughter’s call. It’s not the good,  _ “come look at this drawing I made for you” _ , voice. She’s scared, he gathers immediately, and springs into action—not even bothering to set down the glass he just dried off.

“Morgan?” When he steps into the living room, nothing is visibly amiss. Morgan stands beside the window, arms crossed, looking adorably frazzled. “What’s going on, little lady?” 

Morgan points to the windowsill, a deep frown growing on her young features. Tony steps closer to inspect the window, but still nothing. 

“My eyes aren't as good as they used to be, you know. I’m afraid you’ll have to be more specific.” 

“The spider!” Morgan huffs, and Tony’s blood runs cold. “Get rid of it!” 

He kneels next to her and takes a closer look and—yep, there’s a spider. It isn't very big—maybe the size of a dime—and it sits on the windowsill, seemingly minding its own business.

Tentatively, he places the glass he’s holding over the spider before looking back to Morgan. “I didn't think you were afraid of spiders,” he says, feeling a ghost of sadness was over him. 

“Claire at school said bugs were bad, and spiders are bugs!” She defends, but clearly she doesn't completely agree with Claire as she leans in to take a closer look at the  _ bug  _ in question. “She said they were nasty and once one bit her dog so her mommy had to take him to the vet.” 

Tony looks back to the spider trapped under the glass—he doesn't want to think about  _ it. _ He wishes that Pepper wasn't working upstairs and that Morgan had called her for help instead. “Well, that’s just a load of baloney, I think,” he says, swallowing thickly. “First of all, spiders aren’t bugs. So I don't see how they could be  _ that _ bad.” 

Morgan looks at him in surprise, her eyes so loving and trusting and  _ curious _ . “They’re not?” 

“No,” Tony takes a seat on the floor next to the window and pulls Morgan into his lap. “They’re arachnids.” Despite it being years since the Decimation, Tony can’t help the tears behind his eyes. He holds them back for his daughter’s sake, but the memory of the boy  _ entirely  _ too invested in arachnid’s rights pulls on his heart. 

“I’m surprised he’s out, this close to November,” he continues, pulling the glass closer to the window’s ledge so that Morgan can get a better look at it. “Spiders don't like the cold that much. This one should be asleep in his nest until it gets warmer out.” 

Morgan twists back to look at her father, concern in her eyes—she’s always been empathetic like that. “Is he gonna be okay?”

Tony cards a hand through her hair, just like  _ he  _ would have liked it, and reassures her. “Of course. This one’s a fighter, I can tell. He’ll be fine.”

Maybe it’s selfish that Tony tries not to think about what happened. The first year after the snap had been the worst of his life—worse than being in that wormhole or Afghanistan or when Steve had betrayed his trust. He got out of it eventually, when Morgan was born, but he still thinks about it. Thinks about the hole in his life that could never be filled again. 

Peter. Innocent, pure, Peter. 

Being around the boy had always made him feel a certain way—love, he knows now, but he would have never admitted it before. He should have, but he didn't. And then Morgan was born, and he understood.

Because holding Morgan for the first time, he felt that familiar clench of his heart that he hadn't felt for a while. The same tug at his heartstrings he felt when Peter fell asleep in the lab, when he introduced the boy to Rhodey for the first time and his old friend had told him that he should be proud of what Peter was becoming. As if he didn't already know it. That same feeling he got when Peter would rave about the newest Lego set, when he would rant about how  _ A Day At The Races  _ was Queen’s best album, Happy’s just basic for thinking  _ A Night At The Opera _ is better just because the band’s most popular song was on it,  _ surely you agree with me, sir? _

_ Yeah _ , Tony would say,  _ but I prefer Sheer Heart Attack if I’m being honest.  _

And Peter would just look at him, analyzing him, before snorting,  _ you would. But you're still valid.  _

He got that same feeling of pride—love—when he held his daughter for the first time. It made him realize that the clench in his heart he first experienced with Peter was parental love. That Peter was his son. 

And as he held his newborn daughter in the children’s ward of the hospital, he cried. Cried for the daughter he couldn't wait to get to know and cried for the son he didn't know enough. 

Really, it was like mourning for a second time.

And it’s not like Morgan doesn't know who Peter is. Sure, she doesn't know about the spider thing, but she knows that he was a superhero. That he was the brother she never got to meet. That if she wants to know more about him it’s best to ask Mommy because Daddy might get too sad.

“How do you know so much about spiders, Daddy?” Morgan asks, bringing him out of his reverie. Her eyes remind him of Peter’s, and whenever that thought pops into his head it ushers in a new wave of pain. 

The spider is inspecting his glass prison, curious but not completely trusting. Or, that’s how Tony has personified the arachnid since taking a walk down memory lane. Tony sighs, “Your brother liked them a lot,” he says, referring to Peter as  _ her brother _ for the first time. Sure, Pepper has done it before, but the term had never slipped for his lips before now. 

Morgan deflates a little, though Tony knows that she doesn't fully comprehend the loss of Peter and is only reacting to Tony’s sadness. The concept of Peter doesn't make her sad—she loves him—but  _ Tony and Peter _ cause a different reaction. 

“It’s okay, Morgan—I’m sure he’s happy with his family, now. He’s probably laughing at me right now for being so emotional.” 

Morgan furrows her brow, “I thought you were his family, though?” 

Ouch. 

“He is,” Tony amends, “but he has another daddy that probably misses him a whole lot.”

Morgan giggles, and it’s music to Tony’s ears. “Andy from school has two daddies, too.” 

“Um,” Tony freezes. “That’s not what I meant. At all. In the slightest—” Morgan is laughing at him now, for how flustered he’s gotten. Pepper would be too if she were present at the moment and Peter, watching from whatever cloud he’s lounging on, is probably losing his mind. 

The thought makes him smile. It hurts, but that’s not always a bad thing. 

“Well, we better deal with Mr. Spider—it’s getting late,” Tony hoists himself and a still amused Morgan up and looks around the living room for a piece of paper he can slide under the glass. 

“You’re not gonna take him outside, right?” Morgan asks, suddenly becoming serious. “You can’t! He won’t like the cold!”

“Well, I suppose you’re right about that—silly me,” Tony watches as Morgan leans in close to the spider again, who knows what running through her mind. “What were you thinking?” 

“He can stay here with us,” Morgan promptly lifts the glass and places it on the ledge, this time right-side-up. “I think that’s what Peter would do.” 

It is, Tony realizes. He remembers one winter where Peter was adamant that whatever spider that had somehow gotten into the Tower would be fine if left to its own devices. 

_ She’s not hurting anybody, Mr. Stark! We can’t just kick her out—it’s gonna snow tonight! _

Come to think of it, spiders didn't start showing up at the Tower until Peter arrived in his life. Maybe the two are correlated. 

Of course, that means that Peter might’ve sent this spider, too. However unlikely it is, Tony decides that the thought is somewhat comforting. 

He bids the spider a goodnight before taking Morgan up to her room, and that night Tony has his first  _ good  _ dream featuring Peter in years.    
  


**Author's Note:**

> Hello all! I couldnt get this idea out of my head when I thought of it and I kinda just wanted to post something to remind you that im still alive. I worked on the next chapter of turn and run the other way today, just so you know, and im hoping to get it finished before this semester starts. hopefully. love you!


End file.
